What Do You Want Instead
A few weeks ago during a mentoring session with a client I've been working with for over a year now, I had an epiphany of sorts. Love when that happens!!
At the start of our conversation, I do what I typically do and ask what she wants to work with during our time together. She shared that she wanted clarity about cultivating an intimate relationship and then proceeded to say, "and you know, I have anxiety". Since I've worked with this person many times before, the anxiety conversation is not new. And yet-- this time--I heard what she said in a totally new way. Immediately I replied to her with, "Do you want to have anxiety"? After a long pause she eked out, "uh...no".
I went on to explain how the words we choose have an impact on our reality because they have energetic resonance. As such, if she really wanted to get "rid of" the anxiety, she would first need to contemplate what she wants instead. It was such a powerful realization for the both of us. I helped her to understand that we choose what we want "to have". Meaning, it's our choices, not our circumstances that dictate how we experience life. When we choose to speak, "I have anxiety", we will continue to have the experience of anxiety. However, when we choose to speak, "I have peace..clarity...love...joy", we will begin to experience life as such.
So, the question becomes, if you no longer want what you have...what do YOU want instead?
It's a powerfully important question. Think about it. Would you embark on a road trip for life without first asking, "what do I want to experience?" No way!!! When we know the answer to the question of what we want to have, we are inspired to take action in that direction.
Why is this important? So many reasons!! Life is short, let's enjoy it! And, as I wrote about last week, I want to live with No Regrets. The choices we make (and those we do not make!) create the fabric of our life. Consciously choosing our language to match what we want is an important part of the process to make it happen. The universe is always listening and much prefers statements (and thoughts!) that are affirmative.
Try it for yourself. When you catch yourself saying (or thinking), "I don't want 'x'". Instead, take a moment to upgrade your sentence (or thought) to "I want 'x'". Notice what happens as you practice this consistently (remember consistency = the secret to mastery).